Solitude Double Solitude

It has been six months since my husband died. I am learning to “lie back in the generous comfort of solitude,” as Donald Hall wrote in his essay, “Solitude Double Solitude.” I have never lived alone and am slowly getting used to the benefits of a solitary life. Books and magazines remain on the coffee

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A Heartfelt Thank You

Two hours before my book launch/publication party at Diesel Bookstore in Brentwood, I was nervous and pacing the living room. My book is out there in the world and everyone can read my innermost thoughts and struggles. What if no one shows up for the reading? What if I’m just reading to the toddlers on

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Creating Order Out of Disorder

I get an inordinate amount of joy from organizing my closets and drawers. Since retirement, I have gone through almost every inch of the house to declutter and simplify. I don’t hold each item to see if it sparks joy and there is nothing magical about my process. It’s really a diversion to keep me

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Being Present for 1 Minute, 55 Seconds

I was in Nashville for the solar eclipse on August 21 and it was everything I had hoped it would be – there aren’t enough superlatives to describe the spectacular display. I didn’t know what to expect in terms of crowds and visibility so I left my husband at home with the caregiver. Even long-time

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The Allure of the Open Road

I have always loved long road trips and the tingle of excitement at the thought of the open road. When my husband and I graduated from UCSB, we threw all our belongings into his Datsun pickup and drove from Santa Barbara to Chicago to begin our stints as VISTA volunteers. I remember the exhilaration and

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Hanging Up the Tools of the Trade

June 30 was my last day at LAUSD and I turned in all my devices – laptop, docking station, portable hard drives, iPhone and badge. It was a bittersweet feeling – happiness at no longer being tethered to the District 24/7 but sadness at leaving longstanding relationships with colleagues and staff. All month, there were

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Beauty v.s. Duty

  We drove home from Mammoth a day early and I planned to spend the next day running errands that are hard to do on weekends when I have my husband in tow. He can manage the grocery store pretty well since we use the cart like a walker to help with his balance. The

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A Little Bit of Something

  We have been exercising for over six months now and the recent rains have altered our routine. At the first sign of rain, there are exchanges of texts with Coach D. “Are we working out tonight?” The answer from Coach D is always, “Yes, a little bit of something is better than nothing.” I

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Remnants from the Women’s March

One week ago today, I was at the Women’s March in Washington, DC with hundreds of thousands of people. I took Friday off from work, left my husband with the caregiver and traveled to Baltimore, anxious and nervous. I had never participated in a demonstration before. I stayed near Annapolis with a friend of a

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